Originally Posted by
Tosya89
Very true, you will always be your own worst enemy. My depression went crazy when my wife left me for another man, I could not eat or sleep or we’ll do almost anything. I lost 50 pounds, then I lost another 40 or so before I go so weak I could not even walk anymore. The thing that made me want to start getting better was my 4yr old. She came into my bedroom one day as I was getting dressed and asked me if I was dying. She said I looked like the people on tv that were starved to death and told me she did not want me to die that she loved me. I fucking broke me. And I decided at that moment that fuck everyone and fuck everything else how could I put myself into a position that I may not be there for my children. They did not ask to be here or for their parents but they are here none the less. I am back up to about 170, not quite the 230 I was but who cares. I started to notice the things that I would have missed. It’s funny what you look at every day but don’t see. Like a sunset or a beautiful sky or even two old people holding hands. Yes you may die, but guess what you will die one day regardless of what you do. I have been shot, blown up and lit on fire but I am still here so I guess I will be here until someone else decided it is my time. I hope you get better man, and you are trying so if you keep trying you will get there. If you focus on the mortality of life you will never see anything else. It is like the saying, you can’t see the forest because of all the trees.
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