Thanks all. Have had some major issues past couple days as well. Have tried to contact some of my close friends about it but just too scared that they don't want to hear it, unfortunately the few people that have said that too me recently is just getting harder to ignore.

Starting to get really frustrating, and loneliness has been a problem for me recently too. it's obviously something that's important to me, and it sucks, mostly because of how I got to this point, and the events that happened, which just makes it worse and harder to deal with.