First off before I get started if anyone needs someone to talk/vent/or anything I am always open and harming yourself or anything else in the matter can be prevented.
So, a year ago my friend Jen committed suicide... I knew her since we were in the same teen group and we became friendly since we found out we had things in common. One of them being that we both love soccer and play the same position and love video games. I then found out that she played for a local team and that she played with a couple of my friends and teammates. Now, a couple of sessions after she got moved into a new group for the people who were "doing better". I missed her and a couple of my friends because they were the only ones I talked to. She then came back to the orginal group due to time issues..Soon after I had stopped going because:
A) the doctor basically thought I was crazy
B) "Insurance issues"
C) Sports
Then one day I look on my twitter to find a couple of my friends saying RIP Jen..now I was in just getting into school so already I was upset and tried to hold it in the entire day because I had a track meet and tests...I also thought that maybe there were two Jens on the team or something? Still in shock, my friend in my math class takes me to the bathroom..She tells me that Jen was no longer with us from an email from Jen's mom on their soccer group email..Still not wanting to believe it and still to this day I can't...I was forced to go back into that therapy group which I no longer go to because I can't be there without crying my eyes out. The entire school week I would be in and out of the therapist office because I couldn't handle it. It also woke me up seeing her in a coffin and thinking that I was that way and trying to picture that in my mind was awful. I am angry at her only because there are other ways and it could have been prevented...She would have graduated high school and off to college and who have been 18...
SO PLEASE, PLEASE if you ever feel like harming yourself or anything please see someone and really tell them whats wrong and not keep it inside.